Everton – Blackburn Rovers

1. Hi there, readers. I'd like to promise that this game is going to be a real thriller, but I can't. In fact, if I'm being honest, I think it's going to stink.

2. 1'

   We're off. Both sides are setting out with a 4-5-1 formation, with Dickov and Bent the two young men ploughing a lone furrow up front.

3. 2'

   Everton have dropped Alan Stubbs in favour of Joseph Yobo; I believe they felt threatened by the 'pace' of Paul Dickov. They really shouldn't worry.

4. 3'

   Garry Flitcroft fould Cahill to give Everton an early free-kick. It comes to nothing. Mark Hughes is chewing gum on the sidelines. I'm not a fan of gum-chewing, it has to be said. A dirty habit, if you ask me.

5. 4'

   Flitcroft flies in to another tackle, and wags his finger at the referee when the man in yellow gives a free kick. Garry Flitcroft has a brother, David, who also plays professional football. He plays for Bury.

6. 5'

   Leon Osman wins a corner with a break down the right. Carsley flights in the set-piece, Cahill wins the header but Freidel collects.

7. 6'

   David Thompson breaks from tehe Blackburn left and finds Pedersen with a good ball. Blackburn win a corner.

8. 7'

   Pedersen whips the corner in to a crowded area. The ball eventually falls to Dickov, but Martyn dives at his feet to deny the pesky little Scot.

9. 9'

   Carsley curls in a free kick, but Mokoena clears with his head. Quite a bright start from both sides.

10. 10'

    A seemingly inocuous challenge leaves Carsley on the floor. He's up on his feet after a couple of seconds, and looks quite perky.

11. 11'

    Yobo shows his pace in a sprint with Dickov. David Moyes looks pleased with himself on the sidelines. And well he should; he's a nice chap. I interviewed him once when he was manager of Preston.

12. 12'

    Thompson collects the ball and volleys a shot over the bar from 20 yards. Famously, Thompson used to play for Everton's city rivals Liverpool.

13. 13'

    Dickov receives some treatment in the penalty area. Television shots show an enormous swelling on the side of his knee. Most unpleasant.

14. 14'

    SUB: Stead on for Dickov, who is helped off the pitch by two stout men. Stead is just 21 years-of-age, and has trendy hair. He marks his appearance by spitting heavily on the Goodison turf.

15. 15'

    Johansson curls in a dangerous cross from the left, but Blackburn don't have any players in the box. Perhaps that shows a lack of ambition.

16. 16'

    Mokoena fouls Arteta on the edge of the box. The Spaniard throws himself to the ground as if shot by a sniper. He receives some treatment on his ankle from a man in a hat.

17. 17'

    Arteta walks off, rather gingerly. Carsley blasts in the free kick, which eventually falls to Pistone. The defender shoots from 12 yards. He hits it very hard, but also 15 yards over the bar. Shoddy.

18. 19'

    It's very cold at Goodison Park today. Somewhere around 4 degrees, I'd suggest. That's cold, in anyone's language.

19. 20'

    Duncan Ferguson is seen warming up on the sidelines. That might be because he's about to replace Arteta, or just because he's cold. I'll keep you posted.

20. 21'

    Arteta is showing no inclination towards staying on the field. He gives the ball away in a dangerous area, and Blackburn win a corner. They pile on the pressure, but the home side clear their lines.

21. 22'

    Nelson, the New Zealand international, plays a great ball in to Pedersen, roving down the left wing. He falls under a challenge from Yobo, but wins nothing but derision.

22. 23'

    SUB: Ferguson on for Arteta. Ferguson is the most used substitute in the Premiership, apparently. Is that something to be proud of?

23. 24'

    Everton have changed to two up-front after that substitution. That might free-up a little space in midfield.

24. 25'

    Cahill is hurt after a challenge from Flitcroft. He's up on his feet though, and looks like a new man.

25. 26'

    Ferguson wins a header on the edge of the box, and Cahill tries desperately to get on the end of the knock-down. He fails, however.

26. 27'

    Everton claim a handball as Carsley breaks in to the box. Nothing doing, as far as Referee Dowd is concerned. The home side win a corner, but a Blackburn head clears the danger.

27. 28'

    Thompson attempts to get on the end of a knock-down, but he used his hand to control the ball. A shame, because he was in a good possession.

28. 29'

    Bent wins a free-kick after being blocked by Nelson. 25 yards out, central.

29. 30'

    Carsley curls the free kick towards goal. Time seems to stand still for a moment as we await the outcome. Freidel doesn't move. Tne ball flies a yard wide of the post. Some people sigh. Some people weep. Some people are indifferent.

30. 31'

    I'm often right, and today is no different. I predicted a stinker, and I've been proved correct. The game is lacking something, and I think I know what it is: quality.

31. 33'

    Reid is caught late by Kilbane. Referee Dowd has a quiet word with the Everton midfielder, probably along the lines of: "Any more, and you're going in the book." I imagine that's the sort of thing referees say to players.

32. 35'

    Weir is booked for a two-footed lunge on Thompson. He seems content with the decision.

33. 36'

    Pedersen takes the free kick, but scuffs his shot terribly. Martyn collects easily.

34. 36'

    Ferguson wins a header after a massive clearance from Martyn. Bent gets on the end, but, one-on-one with Freidel, mis-hits his shot straight at the goalkeeper, who makes a good save.

35. 37'

    Flticroft gives away another free kick in a dangerous spot. Carsley again stands over the ball. He takes it short to Hibbert, who curls in a cross. Blackburn eventually clear, though Cahill did briefly threaten.

36. 38'

    Stuart Pearce is spotted in the crowd. He is wearing a pair of gloves. That's how cold it is. England's toughest-ever defender is wearing gloves.

37. 40'

    This new, trendy 4-5-1 formation that every manager in the Premiership seems to favour is doing nothing for the quality of football this season.

38. 42'

    Everton win a corner after Carsley lofts in a free-kick and Kilbane wins a header. The set-piece is taken short. Pistone crosses, but Blackburn clear.

39. 43'

    David Moyes is very animated on the Everton bench. He is directing players with some wonderfully expressive hand gestures.

40. 44'

    Everton are enjoying a good spell of possession, but their only plan seems to be to cross from deep positions towards Bent and Ferguson. They need a little art in their build-up.

41. 45'

    The fourth official deems that four minutes of injury time might be just what this game needs. I disagree, but have no influence in such matters,

42. 45'

    Ferguson wins a free kick after being fouled in the air. Carsley shoots from 25 yards, but it's a yard over the bar. No-one seems surprised.

43. 45'

    HALF TIME: An insipid half of 'football'. Very few chances, very little imagination, lots of running around aimlessly. Things might change in the second half, but I doubt it.

44. 45'

    Here we go! Everyone is back out on the pitch, and they all look very determined and steely. Everyone's hair is looking good and the fans are singing.

45. 45'

    Immediately, Cahill breaks in to the box and wins a corner from Nelson. The ball is curled in from the left, but Blackburn hoof clear.

46. 46'

    Some good football down the Blackburn right. The visitors make a bit of ground. Neill curls a cross in, but Pistone clears.

47. 47'

    Ferguson accidentally catches Mokoena. The South African doesn't make a big deal of it, and is back on his feet.

48. 48'

    Pedersen wins a header, Thompson gets on the end of the flick-on but his first time shot goes wide of the post from eight yards out. Tough chance, but a chance all the same.

49. 48'

    Everton look a lot more purposeful in the second half. Cahill picks up a loose ball and fires in a low cross. Carsley is just a stride away from getting on the end of it.

50. 50'

    There is some nice football being played in the midfield, but both sides seem to lack something in the final third.

51. 51'

    A poor defensive header from Johansson allows Hibbert to curl in a dangerous cross. Ferguson meets it, but heads over from eight yards. He was under pressure, but might have done better.

52. 52'

    This is a tense, tough battle. There is quite a lot to play for, for both sides: Everton for the Champions League spot, Blackburn attempting to avoid relegation.

53. 53'

    Flitcroft makes a good run, but is well tackled by the hard-working Cahill. He's a likeable Australian.

54. 54'

    A great cross from Johansson is well cleared by Yobo. Stead is making some intelligent runs down the channels, but it means no-one is in the middle when Blackburn finally get the ball in the box.

55. 56'

    The initial excitment at the start of the second half has quickly faded. There is a lot of effort and determination out there, but a distinct lack of skill.

56. 57'

    Ferguson deftly heads towards goal from a Pistone cross, but the ball drifts a couple of yards wide of the post. The burly striker applauds his team-mate's effort.

57. 58'

    Reid bursts from the centre of the midfield and fires a well-struck shot towards goal. Martyn watches as it arrows wide.

58. 60'

    Pistone fouls Reid after some neat build-up play. Pedersen shoots, but it's too high. Groan.

59. 62'

    Mokoena is booked after kicking the ball away following a foul. He curses under his breath, knowing that his manager is going to kick his sorry behind after the game.

60. 63'

    Carsley is booked after a strong challenge on Stead. I say 'strong'; what I actually mean is dirty; he kicked Stead in the ribs, for no apparent reason.

61. 64'

    Everton fans get excited as their side win a corner. Yobo wanders in to the box, attempting to look casually indifferent. Bent wins the header from the set-piece, but it goes wide.

62. 66'

    Hibbert defends well under pressure. I'm trying to think of a player who might be a contender for Man of the Match. I really can't decide. I suppose the physios have done a good job.

63. 67'

    Pedersen sends over a cross, Yobo clears. A fellow journalist is attempting to convince me that Yobo turned down moves to Juventus and Arsenal to join Everton. That, quite simply, is utter rubbish. Why would he do that? Why? Give me a single reason why he would do such a thing. He can't, because it's a lie, a complete fabrication, an untruth.

64. 68'

    Stead wins a header in the box, but it doesn't even nearly threaten Nigel Martyn.

65. 71'

    GOAL! Incredibly, Stead makes a good run down the right channel, is found by Reid, and slams a low shot in to the far corner. It's his first league goal of the season.

66. 72'

    A goal completely out of the blue has changed this game. Stead's first league goal since April 2004 has given Blackburn a chance of an unlikely win.

67. 73'

    The Blackburn fans taunt their Everton counterparts with: "Champions League, you're having a laugh, Champions League you're having a laugh." I agree completely.

68. 74'

    Stead is booked for a challenge from behind. Bent attempts to break a couple of challenges, but Reid robs him on the edge of the area.

69. 75'

    SUB: Pistone off, McFadden on. The young Scottish winger arrives to 'boost' Everton's 'attack'. Kilbane drops back in to defence.

70. 76'

    James McFadden is sporting some nice facial hair: a good smattering of dark, coarse hair over cheeks and chin. He looks very rugged, a little like a trucker.

71. 77'

    Thompson fires a shot high and wide after finding some space down the right channel. Martyn looks untroubled.

72. 78'

    Cahill is booked for an inoculous challenge on Reid. A harsh decision from Referee Dowd, who has done quite well otherwise.

73. 79'

    A great spin from Stead earns the youngster some space. He fires a left-foot shot towards goal, Martyn collects at the second attempt.

74. 80'

    Stead was signed last season from Huddersfield Town of the Second Division. He did well in his first few months in the Premiership, but has struggled since. His goal might have won three points today, however.

75. 81'

    Bent handballs, then shoots horribly wide. A bad moment for the striker. Moyes looks angry. The Everton fans are restless. They won't be happy.

76. 83'

    McFadden is blocked by Thompson as he attempted to pass him on the left wing. Free kick, and Thompson only narrowly escapes a booking.

77. 84'

    Osman fires a volley a couple of yards wide after lactching on to a loose ball. He was under pressure from Pedersen, but only twelve yards out.

78. 85'

    Stead does well to beat a couple of Everton men and win a throw deep in enemy territory. The visitors take their time over the throw, to the disgust of the home fans.

79. 86'

    Blackburn are doing well in their efforts to close out this match. They are enjoying a little possession in the Everton half.

80. 87'

    McFadden whips in a dangerous low cross which Freidel collects, after a slight misunderstanding with centre-back Nelson.

81. 89'

    McFadden curls in a free-kick towards Bent at the far post. Blackburn defend well, though.

82. 90'

    Osman fires a low, swerving shot from just outside the area. Friedel is down quickly to his left to save.

83. 90'

    Three minutes of added time.

84. 91'

    FULL TIME: Stead's second-half goal wins it, easing Blackburn's relegation fears and denting Everton's Champions League hopes.

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